A common advice that you often hear is to move on. Move on, man! Move on, girl! Just move on. Is it as simple? Are we actually able to move on? Does moving on really ease the pain? When is moving on difficult? Why is it comforting not to leave that space ever?
A girl found her soulmate, and lived a dream for almost six years. That dream left behind so many sweet memories, loads of respect, love, and tangibles like, children, a whole set of friends, awards, and much more. Almost nineteen years hence, she seemed to have stood frozen in time, though life had merrily moved on. Everything thence seemed only an extension of that point in time. All her memories were made of only the dream she lived, and had no room for the new events. Moving on did not seem feasible and did not work. It was, as if she was attached to an elastic chord pulling her. She tried to pull away but was snapped back into the same mould with even greater force.
Time does stand still, at times. Life may seem to be moving on. Yet, a part of you cannot move past. There are always new memories, new events, and proudest moments; however, there is a feeling of living an extension of the life left behind. Imagine a part of your soul, or a part of your personality splitting-off. Now, think of that split part rooted at one point, watching the other part go on in life. Imagine that you are having an out-of-body experience and the split part is the soul hovering above, watching your other half go on. When you are with the set of friends from your past, you can actually feel both parts of your soul merging. However, do you often wonder if you still belong? Those friends have grown too, had a life, and have acquired additional memories in that life which is no longer yours. Do you not get a mixed feeling of being one of them, yet not belong? Was it a wrong choice to spend the next nineteen years living those six years? What would be the answer if you do not regret even a single moment or a single choice you made? Should you have regrets? Is a new life possible for those who find no reason or the will to let go? If there are no regrets, and life is as good as it gets, then should there be any need to let go. Is life good as it is? Is there a hint of void, veiled by smiles? Does a tinge of envy never creep in?
There are questions aplenty. The most endowed wonder too. Understandably, life is about mulling and expecting more. The girl of that story may have momentary periods of disquiet, but I am sure that she has so much more to be grateful for. Accepting the cards that fate deals you and playing them to your advantage defines you. Sometimes, when one loses sight of the life’s purpose, it makes sense to go back to the mental drawing board and creating a roadmap. A physical roadmap with the dreams and the aspirations is even better. A pact with the inner you and a belief system helps you stay the course. Even those who have no allegiance to any higher power should swear allegiance to self. A faith in your ambitions should be enough to drive you.
The truth is that, in spite of no regrets, there will always be a heartache. Some may find it easy to move on. For those who have lived the perfect dream, accepting anything less, even second best, may not be an option. Some part of you will definitely be left behind, though life may not exactly stand still, and the clock may not stop. A feeling of desolation will not be easy to shake-off. Heartache and longing will stay too. Nonetheless, rest assured that when you start counting your blessings, the balance sheet would look bountiful and would show maximum profit.
||Sarvam Sri Krishna Arpanamastu||